I need a life raft. I'm drowning.
I won't give too many details, but in this past week my life has turned upside down. I've been a ball of stress, an emotional wreck.
My name and cell number were posted on a sex ad on craigslist, and I had to deal with the disturbing, uncomfortable, creepy fall-out of that. I don't know who did it, but it's in the police's hands now. I had to change my number. I wonder if this will get resolved, and it freaks me out and continues my stress to think it may not. Who.would.do.this.
My heart was broken again. I questioned something in trying to clarify feelings, and it was unwanted and not tolerated. I shouldn't have said it, but it was an honest inquiry. It wasn't worthy of ending the relationship, by any means, but it apparently did. It froze his feelings for me, and now we aren't even talking.
Sh*t at work is messed up, with the fallout of something I had nothing to do with. I'm hoping it blows over, but I'm tired of feeling like in order to actually teach these kids what they need to learn, I have to shut my door and whisper.
My sister and her family left for 2 weeks in the Keys. I won't have my family here to spend time with and touch base with every day. Softball's starting, so I'd have less time anyway, but even seeing my nephews and rehashing the day with my sister for just a few minutes on an almost daily basis feeds me.
I had a big running week, with several quality workouts and a new 5k PR, but it's not balancing out the other stuff. In fact, today's easy 15 was anything but. My legs were dead (it's ok, Coach said they would be, but still), my whole body hurt by mile 12, and my heavy heart and jumbled mind affected me greatly today.
I need a life raft. I need some happiness. I'm drowning right now.
5 comments:
Sorry your week sucks. No where to go but up this week.
At least the running is positive! Imprssive 5k PR! My long run today sucked after yesterday's 5k too. I need to go back and read pfitz' philosophy on doing tune up races at all, let alone the day before a long run! Maybe it will make the marathon feel that much easier, on rested legs.
Wasn't your sister doing a marathon today? How was it.
Hang in there.
Oh no. What a week. I really hope this week is much better. Sometimes trying to go hard in training and dealing with other stressful stuff is to much. (I learned this the hard way). Listen to your body and don't be afraid to just go for a run to unstress, not necessarily to train.
Tons of hugs to you and positive energy!
Maybe find some time this week to do something special for yourself - anything from reading a gossipy magazine while soaking in a bubble bath to splurging for a new cute springy outfit.
No words, just lots of support headed your way. (((Solar)))
I'm so disheartened that someone would do that to you (the craigslist thing). How awful.
I like SSB's advice. Just run (or bike, swim, lift, aerobicize, walk, etc) for the sake of doing it. The repetition of it. The way your legs feel while you're doing it. The solitude or, if you choose, the group energy. Just do it to make yourself feel good and not to reach any specific training goal.
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